Ben’s Journal Entry 3 – Two Tips That Helped Me To 14 Days Porn Free

Hello! I haven’t updated in awhile, but once I make it through today, without porn, I will be at 14 days porn free. This is one of the longest streaks I’ve ever had. Here are the things I learned that have helped me these two weeks.

1. Avoid browsing

Cassie and I found out early that browsing is my downfall. I absent mindedly view content. This includes news articles, Facebook, YouTube, Reddit, Quora, even Amazon. I just feel a constant impulse to fill all of my idle time with media. I know I am not alone in this, in fact, Cassie has even been catching herself browsing all the time now that she is aware.

Desperate times call for desperate measures. Reluctantly, I began giving these things up.

First, I gave up Reddit

Reddit was first, and hardest. My life basically revolved around Reddit. I had no idea what to do to fill my time. I actually got anxious when I was bored and couldn’t check Reddit. I miss the communities at /r/nofap and /r/pornfree, but Reddit as a whole was my biggest problem with leading me down a bad path. And bear in mind, this took a lot of pleading by Cassie to get me to leave it. Only now, months later, do I realize that I can not go on Reddit right now. Maybe later in life, once I have a better handle on my porn addiction, but not now. It is simply too easy to “stumble on” porn on Reddit.

Then others had to go

As I removed media outlets from what I allowed myself to view, others filled the void. After I blocked Reddit, I began frequenting Facebook, and then found myself on Facebook pages that were overtly sexual. Facebook had to go.

This same pattern repeated with many sites.

  1. Block a website
  2. Find a new website to occupy my idle time
  3. Find porn or sexual content on the new site
  4. Confess to Cassie
  5. Block the website
  6. Repeat
The cycle had to end

At some point Cassie and I realized that “browsing” is not something I can do right now. I can not have content placed in front of me. For some reason, this triggers my dopamine pathways in a similar way as porn and get me moving toward it. So I outlawed myself from browsing. My definition for browsing is: Content that I did not explicitly search for. If I could give up the internet, I would. It would make it all much easier, just for 90 days so my brain can reset a little. However, I am a programmer, and I need Google to do my job.

So, how did I do it? Well, I installed a couple blockers. the main one being K9. I set the filters for what made most sense for me. Then, I blocked all of my trouble websites. I also added url keywords for every pornographic term I know.

Blocking is a great reminder, but it’s really about how you act

Blocking can only do so much. I found that if you treat the blocker like the police, you will just find a way around it. You have to really not want to view porn, deep down. Which leads me to my next point.

2. Choose to not view porn

Well, duh, right? Actually, it’s not so simple.

When you are of a clear mind, and nothing is tempting you, this is obvious. You don’t want to be addicted to porn, it is hurting your life in some way; you choose to not watch porn. It is when you are tempted to use porn that you must choose whether you want to or not.

The reason it is so hard to say no when you are in the grips of an urge is due to your brain. Your brain has been conditioned to seek porn. Porn makes your brain release feel-good chemicals. The more it releases these chemicals, the more your brain seeks out whatever you were doing when these chemicals were released, in this case, porn. To a great extent, this is reversible.

The way to reverse this brain “pathway” is to essentially starve it to death. I usually see the 90 day number thrown around as to how long starving the pathway takes, but I haven’t seen proof of this. No matter how long it takes, this is what you must do to finally escape your porn addiction.

So, when your brain tells you to look at something sexual, really ask yourself if viewing it is worth feeding that pathway again. Every time you give in, you are strengthening it, and prolonging your battle. By no means does this knowledge make the fight easier, but to me, it makes the fight more worthwhile.


I have been able to be porn free for two weeks now, and I attribute it to the two points I made above. Try them for yourself and let me know what you think. And like always, if there is anything at all that you want to talk to me about, please use the contact page, and I will get back to you as fast as I can.

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